


No Judging

by RonnieSilverlake



Series: Liquefied Love [3]
Category: Free!
Genre: (at least some of it is fluff), Drama, Fluff, Holding Hands, M/M, Tumblr: makoharufestival
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-16
Updated: 2014-01-16
Packaged: 2018-01-08 23:39:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1138821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RonnieSilverlake/pseuds/RonnieSilverlake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Makoto has to admit, it has been feeling like there was a solid case of ice around his heart in the past few weeks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Judging

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [MakoHaru Festival](http://makoharufestival.tumblr.com) on tumblr.  
> Day 3  
> Prompt: Holding Hands

It is Nagisa who first notices. It is a subtle change; the two of them still share their all-knowing looks, as if sharing some inside knowledge, or even a joke, between them, that nobody else is privy to; the way Makoto's expression literally melts into the gentlest of smiles he has always reserved for Haruka, and Haruka only, the way Haruka's eyes shine with a kind of startling happiness, even though it's been how many months now? since they've come out to their friends about their relationship. Everything should be all right, given the way the rest of them received the news; of course, all of them were happy for them (maybe Gou was a little overenthusiastic, too), even Rin refrained from teasing just for the sake of it.

It changed when the two of them returned from their solitary trip to Tokyo, or so Nagisa thinks. It takes him a while to detect what exactly is wrong; it doesn't feel like there is a rift between the two, but they still pull up some kind of wall as soon as they are among other people. (Nagisa secretly sneaks after them one afternoon, even though he lives in another direction, and witnesses the two of them stop on their way, Haruka tugging Makoto into a shadowy little alley's end, press him against the wall, and kiss him almost forcefully - after which Nagisa quickly retreats, of course. Still, he concludes that it has to do with being seen by them - and it is more than confusing.)

It is not that the pair of them were ever big on public displays of affection. Well, fact is, Haruka isn't, and Makoto respects the fact. But, there is  _one_ exception Haruka has made -  **holding hands**. Nagisa has to laugh a bit when he recalls how it started; Rin came by at the end of one of their swimming practices, to pick Gou up, because she had apparently made him promise some family bonding time. Haruka's mouth dropped open slightly as he saw the way Gou clung to her brother happily, and especially at the way Rin looked to the other side and huffed in slight annoyance, but at the same time, his fingers tightened around Gou's rather noticeably. "Why do they do that?" Haruka asked quietly then, startling Makoto, whose sight of the Matsuokas was partially obscured from the way he was still toweling his hair dry.

"Do what?"

"Hold hands," Haruka said simply, and Makoto laughed.

"It's a family kind of thing, I suppose," he said lightly, his eyebrows raising slightly at the disappointed expression crossing Haruka's face. "Uhm... A gesture of protection, then? I hold Ran and Ren's hands too, when I go pick them up from school." The frown remained, and Makoto was trying to grasp for thoughts to figure out what Haruka was actually getting at. "Ah, it's like... the way you used to hold mine, when we were small, and I was scared of things." It seemed he hit the jackpot this time around. Haru's expression mellowed out, and all pretense was dropped when he reached out, and gingerly hooked his little finger together with the brunet's.

"I want to hold Makoto's hand again."

Nagisa remembers he had to plaster both his palms over his mouth to keep himself from giggling aloud, and disrupting the moment, while Rei shot him disapproving looks, and later on babbling about how truly beautiful Makoto and Haruka's relationship was, while they too went to shower.

Rei has a point, though, or so Nagisa thinks. Which is exactly why it's so odd for them to have stopped. From that day onwards, they've always been departing from practice's end towards home hand in hand, Makoto becoming less and less flustered about it with each passing day, and Haruka looking almost  _smugly_ content. (The only thing making Nagisa even happier than seeing his friends fit so well with each other, was when one afternoon Rei decided to subtly slip his own fingers in between Nagisa's own, with a furious blush spreading on his face, while the blond just giggled, and gave a reassuring squeeze back.)

So why'd they stop?

Every time the thought crosses his mind, Nagisa  _almost_ asks. But then, he always sees the little things; how Makoto's hand brushes against Haruka's, and the dark-haired boy jerks as if burnt, then Makoto looks away, a look of distant sadness in his eyes; or how Makoto chooses to grip his chair's edge and bite down on his lip when the group of them go watch a movie together, and there's a part full of tension, one which would usually prompt the tall boy to hold onto Haruka (which has been a habit of his well before they were even romantically involved). And then, oddly, Nagisa just can't bring himself to say anything, because it feels as if it's almost too much for them to deal with, even without him being an obnoxious blabbermouth that he is very well aware that he usually is, nosing into everyone's business (as Rei likes to remind him).

The bursting point, when Nagisa just can't take it any longer, is when they get word of Haru having applied to a nearby store to work at, and Makoto looks as impassive about this news as Haru himself usually does. "What, but didn't you guys go to Tokyo together to check out universities?!" Nagisa exclaims, incredulous and somewhat pissed at being left out of apparently so much more than he would have thought. Makoto simply looks away, biting his lip again, while Haru gives his usual  _'what's-the-big-deal'_  look. Nagisa thinks he's just about ready to explode, but at that moment, Gou and Ama-chan-sensei appear, and there is no time to ask more - time to swim.

Up to this point, they've been covering up well enough to not hinder their performance, but after Nagisa's comment, it becomes blatantly obvious that something is wrong. Makoto is completely out of breath after just 450 metres, and despite Gou's continuous yelling, Haruka doesn't even pretend he's making an effort, deciding to swim in a leisurely, relaxed fashion, as if wanting nothing more than distance himself from where he is at the moment. As for Nagisa, he's just too frustrated to concentrate, and gives up one lap after Makoto pushed himself out of the pool, coughing and wheezing, climbing out after the team captain, and shaking water out of his hair. "So, what's all this about, Mako-chan?" he asks when it looks like the brunet has more or less caught his breath. "Is everything all right between you guys?" Makoto looks up at him, the genuine surprise in his eyes already answering the question, making Nagisa in turn feel relieved, but even more confused.

"Why wouldn't it?"

"You were all about going to a big university together, and now Haru-chan's getting a job here instead," Nagisa said in a tone that implied it should have been obvious. Makoto is avoiding his eyes again. "So, what's it gonna be? You go without him? You both stay and throw away your dreams? Why?" Makoto looks more and more downcast by the second, and Nagisa knows Haru has his eyes on them, beginning to close the distance to join the conversation. Even Gou has stopped yelling at him in favour of edging closer to listen, and Rei is doing the same on the other side. Nagisa doesn't really care for any of them at the moment. "You've stopped holding hands, too," he finally says, as a declaration that overrules everything else, and oddly enough, this last part is the one that seems to affect the brunet the most, now looking like someone slapped him in the face.

"People are intolerant there."

Nagisa glances at Haru, who is approaching with a towel thrown over his head, piercing azure eyes glaring at the blond, though it somehow looks as if he isn't really targeting  _him_ with that glare, but rather, the people he is talking about. "We got some really bad comments," he continues matter-of-factly. "About..." He doesn't quite know how to word it, so he simply shrugs; it should be obvious enough. "Well, it made Makoto really uncomfortable, so we just stopped, to avoid hearing that kind of stuff."

"I've heard that it's more common in bigger places," Rei decides to join the conversation, his goggles hanging in his neck, wet bangs brushed out of his face as he pushes his regular glasses on. "They are more open to Western culture, and Western religion has a history of intolerance for anything that doesn't fit their standard traditions, including the fact that a romantic relationship should be between a man and a woman..." He trails away when he sees Makoto wince visibly; the brunet bites down so hard this time that his lip begins bleeding. "Ah, I'm sorry, Makoto-senpai... I didn't mean..." Gou hurries away to fetch the first aid kit, and there is a moment of awkward silence, but then it is Nagisa again who plows on.

"Well, okay, fine, people in big cities are jerks, but what does that have to do with how you guys are back home? Did you think  _we'd_ think any differently?" Haru merely gives a noncommittal shrug, which mostly just means he was simply going along with Makoto's wishes all along, but is already sort of offensive to Nagisa nonetheless, but it is still the vulnerable, lost expression on Makoto's face that makes him burst out, "What the hell, aren't we your friends, Mako-chan?!"

Makoto ducks his head and mumbles a semi-audible apology, but all of them jump when they hear a new voice enter the conversation (and Gou almost drops the first aid kit). "What a load of bullshit."

Nagisa has completely forgotten that Rin said he would join their practice today; surprisingly enough, he has brought along his short-haired  _kouhai_ as well. "If you really love something, you don't wanna hide it from the world, no matter what they might say," the redhead continues, staring straight at Haru as everyone turns towards them to greet them. It does not evade Nagisa's attention that the way Rin holds his arm loosely, the tips of his fingers still touch Ai's, as if they, too, had been holding hands, and have just let go upon arrival (further proven by the brilliant blush on the younger boy's face). "If you really wanna do something, just fucking  _do it_ , instead of coming up with excuses about why you can't!"

Nagisa can't really explain why this is the exact moment he bursts out laughing, but at least it breaks the tense atmosphere. " _You_ would know, Rin-chan," he laughs, which makes Rin go almost as scarlet in the face as his hair is, and mutters something along the lines of 'shut the fuck up'. But Nagisa's attention is already elsewhere, back on the pair of Haruka and Makoto, the latter bowing his head down a bit to accommodate Haruka's height as the dark-haired boy whispers something into his ear, and even though there is only a hint of a smile that appears on Makoto's face, it already makes Nagisa's stomach fill with butterflies of happiness.

All right, so maybe it's none of his business, really. But, as he said, they are friends. So he cares. And when that afternoon he sees the two depart towards their homes with their fingers interlaced once more, Makoto seemingly having an almost vicelike grip on Haruka's hand, the blond is so happy that he swings his arms impulsively around a still half-undressed Rei's neck, and kisses him on the cheek, catching him completely off guard.

* * *

Makoto has to admit, it has been feeling like there was a solid case of ice around his heart in the past few weeks. When Haruka takes his hand once again, it's like warmth shoots through him, spreading everywhere, melting everything that has been frozen up.  _'I told you,'_  is what Haru whispered into his ears at the poolside, and now he really has to admit what a fool he has been. "Why did you agree, then?" he murmurs, his grip tightening a little, to which he receives a low hiss in response.

"Makoto, you're crushing my fingers. What?"

"Oh, sorry, sorry." He loosens the contact a bit, but doesn't release. "Why did you agree with me, if you thought otherwise?"

Haruka shrugs noncommittally, but there is a small start of a blush on his cheekbones that doesn't go unnoticed. "I don't care what others think. They can talk all they want. But..." His voice drops a little lower. "I thought, if it makes Makoto happy..."

And, being in public be  _ **damned**_ at this point, because there is just nobody in the entire world in this moment who could stop Tachibana Makoto from tugging his boyfriend to himself, wrapping him up into an embrace (again, a bit crushing, but Haru manages not to complain just yet), and giving him the most preposterously deep and loving of kisses Haruka has ever received from him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Constructive criticism is appreciated! If you liked it, please like/reblog the [original post](http://makoharufestival.tumblr.com/post/73535654538/challenge-holding-hands-user-streganicha-rating) on tumblr!
> 
>  **Disclaimer:** I intended to cause no harm with Rei's religious comment. It is a fact that Shintō and Buddhism are much more open and accepting than Christianity is, and that same-sex relationships were a part of Japanese history, even a sign of authority, as many famous warlords have been known to have had such relationships prior to the Edo era. Discrimination only began when Japan was forced to open up for trade, and thus began adopting the culture of the West. To this day, smaller towns tend to be more traditional, so I thought it legible that they wouldn't cause a scandal in Iwatobi, or that people in general would be much more open-minded about it.


End file.
